“Loving communication skills isa top priority for lasting, happy relationships.”
Have you ever been left wondering how a seemingly simple conversation could go so horribly wrong?
Feel like you’ve stepped on a land mine you had no idea was there?
Or had the feeling that if you just had the right words and knew how to say them you could open up a special moment to a whole new level of depth and intimacy?
True communication, to ‘commune’ with another, can bring about the most exquisite experience of understanding, connection and union.
How you communicate can open another’s heart, or close it. It can create or destroy trust. The quality of your communication skills can make your partner feel special or worthless, loved and supported, or misunderstood and alone.
Communication can also be a battleground of hurt and frustration. Sadly, much communication is unconscious. When it goes wrong, you often have no idea what happened.
Poor communication is one of the most often cited reasons for relationship breakdown.
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HumanCommunication is Complex!
How you express yourself in intimate relationship is largely unconscious. It’s influenced by your personal history, early imprinting, family life, culture, belief systems and so on.
Your body language, such as facial expressions, tone of voice, eye movements and hand gestures are a large part of your communication, not simply the words you use.
When you are emotionally triggered, your Reptilian brain magnifies threat and shuts off access to rational thought and emotional empathy. Effective communication is impossible in this state.
Movies and TV series surround us with examples of communication that are intended as entertainment. The dialogue is sassy, funny, cool and mocking. This teaches you how to make someone winner and someone a loser, how to be top dog. Not surprisingly, this type of communication kills intimacy and does not contribute to happy relationships.
Once you understand and apply the principles of effective communication, the results can seem almost magical.
Modern relationships come with high expectations and a degree of complexity that most people have not been taught the skills for. It is natural that you need guidance and support to create the happy relationships you desire.
The process will expand your thinking and understanding. You will have many ‘aha!’ moments. It will take practice to apply these new skills and ways of thinking, and you may be temporarily out of your comfort zone. Remember that the solution to a problem rarely lies where you have already looked, so a little journey into the unknown is necessary.
The rewards are many and are different for every individual and couple…Self-confidence, the joy of connection, the relief of feeling understood, knowing how to express yourself while staying connected to and caring for your partner, feeling safe and cherished in your relationship again…such things are truly precious.
1 Day Workshop
In our Communication Skills for Relationship Workshop, you will unravel the mysteries of effective communication, such as:
-how simple changes in your choice of words take you from accusation and alienation to connection.
-communication when dating
-the importance of clearing up misunderstandings as they occur so they can’t gather momentum
-how to express feelings, even difficult ones
-the importance of healthy boundaries and how to have them
-identify and avoid co-dependent patterns of relating
-use verbal and non-verbal communication to keep the spark alive
-use neuroscience to your advantage and stack the odds in favour of love
-the importance of continuing to express who you really are, how you really feel and what you really want to your partner or spouse
-making time for connection to support happy relationships
-the reptilian brain in action, noticing this and what to do
-how to think outside the box and make win-win agreements
-how to have a fight fair
-the best ways to communicate about sex
The workshop is suitable for both couples and single people. The understanding and communication skills gained, while specifically applied to intimate relationship and dating in the workshop context, will be of benefit in all spheres of life, including friendship, family life, work relationships and leadership roles.
